Self-Esteem

Well first of all, hello to that one ciewer who visits this little space of mine almost religiously, everyday. Your support is much appreciated and I’m really sorry about the lack of posts but I really only blog when there’s been something that ) strikes me especially hard. (Not literally of course or else I’d be typing this from a hospital bed)

Okay a quick update for anyone who cares at all, currently in the midst of a week-long holiday, which in Singapore merely means a week devoid of school-related activities AND school, if you’re lucky enough. To be fair this hol’s been kind enough to me, to rejuvenate, catch up on Masterchef, and mug (not necessarily in order haha)

So, on to the point of this post. Let’s just say that my weight has been on a steady increase since secondary school, I’m saying this because taking it back further to primary school would be an even bigger blow for my weak heart.

It was always a few kg here and there and I never really got bothered by my weight except after the occasional gathering when the aunties would be like “ohh you put on some weight ah!” Yeah, real subtle. Thanks I didn’t know that already. As I was saying, I never really cared about my weight, rather, I assumed I’d be in the healthy range. My my would I be proven wrong after each depressing height and weight session.

Fast forward to JC, my weight skyrocketed to its highest value ever. At least in SC we had to maintain with our appetites, what with the sleevles pinafores and constrictive belt. In Nanyang, it was whole new tory. An array of food was always available, together with the numerous breaks we were granted, my greediness for food knew no bounds. Damn.

I gained weight like crazy, and still didnt take notice. Until today. Brandising my trusy Ikea paper ruler thingy, I measured my waist. Or so I thought. It might as well have been the waist of an elephant and no one would have known the difference. I had been too good at hiding from the truth, ignoring my weight gain. The worst thing is that the weight was somewhat acceptable, it was the measurements that scared the shit out of me. Highest of all high numbers I’ve ever “achieved”.

To say I was sad would be like saying Roger Federer was disappointed he lost the chance of another US Open Final- a gross understatement. My world literally came crashing down.

I guess that’s what you get for one too many claypot rice(s). I’m hoping that I can lose this damned belly bulge with the help of exam stress and Blogilates. Please please please. No one wants to be fat AND stupid.

 

Well that was depressing. Sorry my dear reader. Had to get to out somewhere.

(true story by the way)

 

char

 

 

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